Retrouvaille Vancouver – A Lifeline for Marriages

Sometimes when couples suffer the loss of an infant or child, their marriage can also suffer.  Retrouvaille is a “lifeline for marriages” that are in trouble.  I have personally met a number of couples who thought their marriages were over until they decided to participate in the Retrouvaille program.

Here is information on upcoming weekends:

With the pressures and demands of modern life and too little time, personal
relationships are often taken for granted. It is easy to forget that strong relationships
take work. Before we realize it, we have drifted apart and the gulf between us seems
insurmountable.
Sometimes married couples even experience what seem like irreparable crises:
indifference, hatred, infidelity, abuse, addiction, separation. They may think that there
is no hope for their marriage, and believe that the only way out of their misery is
DIVORCE.
We are here to tell you that there is hope. 
There is a better, more constructive way out of what seems like a hopeless situation. If
you can find the willingness to try repairing your marriage, Retrouvaille can help you
put the pieces back together and rebuild the loving relationship you once had – even
make it better than ever! The Retrouvaille program consists of one weekend and six
follow-ups. The couples who present the program are all volunteers who have
experienced the recovery of their own marriages through Retrouvaille.
There are Retrouvaille programs commencing 
the weekend of April 25 – 27, 2014 in the Lower Mainland 
and the weekend of May 9 – 11, 2014 on Vancouver Island. 
For more information about this transformational Catholic peer ministry,
visit www.retrouvaille.org or www.retrouvaillevancouver.com,
email Vancouverbc(at)retrouvaille.org, or call 60(four)-530-671(zero)

Infant Remembrance Mass – Dec.28, 2013

This is a lovely way to honour your baby during the Christmas season…I know this can be a tough time of year.

Sending warm thoughts and prayers,

Keaton’s Mommy

~~~

Bereaved parents, friends, and other family members are invited to come and celebrate the all-too-brief lives of their dearly loved and missed babies lost to miscarriage, pre-term birth, stillbirth, and infant death at a special service on the Feast of the Holy Innocents.

Whether your baby was lost recently or long ago, you are welcome to come and remember. Women seeking healing from post-abortion grief and trauma are also welcome. The day of the service is the Feast of the Holy Innocents, a day the Church has set aside to specially remember little ones gone too soon.

Location: St. Ann’s Church, 33333 Mayfair Avenue, Abbotsford

Date: Saturday December 28th, 2013

Time: 9:00 am

Reception to follow

Please RSVP at 604 852-5602 or by email to adultfaith(at)stannsabbotsford.ca so we can prepare sufficient mementoes for babies and for the reception. If you’ve named your baby (or babies), please let us know the name(s).

A Beautiful Service

On Saturday, Nov.2nd on the Feast of All Souls’, a special service was held to remember our dearly departed including the lives of infants and children who died too soon.

Families were invited to light candles and bring them up to the altar in memory of their loved ones as “Ave Maria” was sung.  Some walked to the front of the church tearfully as they held their votives.  There were many who expressed appreciation for the choir as the songs were beautifully sung, and the words reflected hope and healing.

After the service, everyone was invited to enjoy tea and treats and socialize at the Teddy Bear Tea.   At this reception, bereaved family members got a chance to meet each other and share their stories.  These families were also encouraged to write the names of heavenly children in the “Little Book of Life”, to take home prayer cards and choose a teddy bear.

To all the families that I met that day, I feel fortunate to have met all of you and will keep you in my prayers.  The first year into the grief journey can be so difficult…if you need to connect with other bereaved families, please contact me – there is no need to journey alone.

Thank you to all the volunteers who helped make this event happen.  To those who played and sung in the choir, to those who volunteered at the Mass and reception, and those who could not attend, but dropped off food and teddy bears.  Special thanks to Fr. John, Pastor at St. Nicholas Parish for his prayers, support and for celebrating Mass on this day.

For more information about future Infant and Child Remembrance Services hosted by Elizabeth Ministry, please visit our events page.

Many blessings,

Keaton’s Mommy

Oct.15 International Infant & Child Loss Day

Here are some events happening Tues. Oct.15, 2013:

Infant Memorial Mass

The staff of Bell & Burnaby Funeral Chapel cordially invite you to a Memorial Mass in remembrance of infants who have passed away. The special Mass will be held at St. Francis of Assisi Parish, 2025 Napier Street, Vancouver, on Tuesday, Oct. 15 at 7 p.m. Reception follows at the church hall.

All are welcome. Please R.S.V.P. your attendance at 604-298-2525 or info@bellburnaby.com

BC Place Stadium

Members of Still Life Canada will be gathering in Athlete’s Village to watch BC Place glow blue and purple in memory of babies who have died. Please see Still Life Canada’s latest (last minute!) blog post about the event, written by the bereaved father who made it happen: http://still-lifecanada.ca/01/uncategorized/this-little-light-of-mine.

Langley Lawn Cemetery

Langleys Mourning Mothers honours all babies lost to miscarriage, stillbirth or infant loss at a commemorative service in the Langley Lawn Cemetery, 4393 – 208th Street in Langley. Look for the Baby-Tree at the Tomb of the Unknown Baby at 1:30pm.  For more information please contact Susan Simmons at 604-575-0311.

 

Infant & Child Loss Remembrance Service – Nov. 2nd, 2013

*Infant & Child Loss Remembrance Service*

& Teddy Bear Tea

St. Nicholas R.C. Church – 20675 87th Ave., Langley, BC

Remembrance Mass Service: 9:00 am

“Teddy Bear” Tea Reception: 10:00 am hosted by St. Nicholas Parish/Elizabeth Ministry

*RSVP: info(at)littlelightofheaven.com

Prayers will be included for parents and family members who wish to honour the lives of all children gone-too-soon, including;

– Children of any age

– Infants & Toddlers

– Babies lost shortly after birth and through Sudden Infant Death Syndrome

– Babies who have died during pregnancy for any reason (e.g. ectopic pregnancy, miscarriage, complications and stillbirth)

Couples who are trying to conceive and those struggling with infertility; parents who are expecting and those on a waiting list to adopt; as well as parents who lovingly chose to give up and/or welcome children through adoption and fostering will also be remembered on this day.

TEDDY BEAR TEA

Everyone is welcome to attend the reception immediately after the service.  Families will be offered a teddy bear in honour of their child through Elizabeth Ministry.  These teddy bears have been kindly donated by organizations such as Signal Hill and Gardens of Gethsemani.

Families can enter the name of their child in the “Little Book of Life” and light a candle for their little one.

This event is open to everyone from all faiths and backgrounds, especially bereaved parents and other family members including children, as well as those who support grieving families.

*Please RSVP so that enough programs, candles & refreshments are available.

ADDITIONAL INFORMATION

*Elizabeth Ministry is a faith-based, peer mentorship volunteer organization that celebrates the sanctity of life and honours the lives of all children.

We’re looking for volunteers to assist!  If you are interested in donating a teddy bear or refreshments, volunteering or starting a chapter at your Parish, please contact:

Donna, Elizabeth Minister St. Nicholas Chapter – info (at) littlelightofheaven.com

Please note:  At this service, we will honour and celebrate the lives of our little Saints in heaven.  This Mass will be held on the Feast of All Souls’ Day.

 

Coming Together To Share Stories

Today, I attended day 1 of the Still Birth Conference, Coming Together to Share Stories organized by Still Life Canada.   Tears were shed and stories were told in an atmosphere of compassion and understanding.  This clearly was a safe place to speak the names of our precious babies who had gone-too-soon.   

It was amazing to hear Dr. Joanne Cacciatore speak about her work with bereaved families and the research she has conducted done in honour of her stillborn daughter Cheyenne.  Health care professionals who came to participate in the conference displayed a willingness to listen and learn from bereaved families.   The team of doctors, nurses, social workers and policy makers all seemed motivated to facilitate positive changes in the hospitals to help buffer the trauma of infant loss which was encouraging.    

A big part of Elizabeth Ministry is to listen to the stories of others and to also share our own.  Peer support can be a simple, yet powerful way to facilitate healing in many ways.  Knowing that you are not alone, that there are others who are on a similar journey can bring a lot of comfort.  I’m grateful that Still Life Canada organized this event. 

So where do we go from here?  I look forward to day 2 of the Coming Together to Share Stories conference and the action plan that comes of this gathering.  Kudos to the volunteers who made this conference happen.    

Support BC’s Newest Adoption Agency

“Swing into Summer Gala” fundraising event June 14th

All proceeds go toward start up fees for the adoption agency, Home for Every Child Family Services! The event will be held at the Langley Golf and Banquet Centre.  Doors open at 5:45pm and dinner will be served at 6:15pm.

Come find out about this new Christian agency and the orphan crisis, be a part of the silent auction, and learn how to swing dance!

There will be a 30 minute lesson followed by an evening of music and dancing!

Deadline for purchasing tickets:  June 6th.

Tickets Still Available!

Hope to see you there!

Apr. 23, 2012- Living Through Grief Bereavement Seminar

Guest Speaker: Denis Boyd, R. Psychologist

6:30pm – 9:30pm at St. John the Apostle Parish, Vancouver BC

Are you suffering the loss of a friend or family member? Are you grieving the loss of a baby who has died during pregnancy, birth, or in infancy? How can you help someone who is bereaved? Denis will discuss characteristics of healthy and unhealthy grief, as well as effective coping strategies after the loss of a loved one. Also hear from a parent who will share her faith-based journey in search of hope and healing after the loss of an infant.

*Pre-payment/registration required. Call Denis Boyd & Associates 604-931-7211 to save your seat! Cost: Only $25/person

Celebrating the Brief Lives of Our Little Ones

An Infant and Child Remembrance Service and Teddy Bear Tea was held at St. Nicholas Parish in Langley on Feb.18th. Many families gathered at this Mass to honour babies and children gone-too-soon.

At the front of the altar, the Paschal Candle was lit and individual votives were carefully set out for the candle lighting ceremony. The hymns were beautifully led by two young women that made up the intimate choir and the music reflecting hope and healing set the tone for this meaningful service.

This special occasion was celebrated by Rev. John McCarthy, Pastor at St. Nicholas Parish to help support families suffering the loss of a young child. A bereaved mother involved with Elizabeth Ministry at the Parish approached Father about hosting this service and he kindly agreed. 

In the homily, Father talked about how our heavenly children are an important part of our families and actively praying for us. As a part of the Communion of Saints, may these little ones help us strengthen our faith as we seek eternal life. 

Meaningful Prayer Intentions

After the homily, the following prayers were included to acknowledge the various kinds of loss that guests may be suffering from:

1.       We pray for bereaved families mourning the loss of a loved one, especially infants and children; including babies who have died during pregnancy, and at birth.

2.      We pray for couples who are struggling with infertility and those trying to conceive.

3.      We pray for families who are expecting and those waiting to adopt; as well as families who lovingly chose to give up and/or welcome children through adoption and fostering.

4.      We pray for healing for the parents of unborn babies.  May they seek God’s peace and receive support in their journey. 

5.      We also pray for those in our community who may be estranged from others and their faith, may they be welcomed back home. 

Healing Flame of the Paschal Candle

Tapers were lit from the Paschal candle and walked to the back of the Church where one by one, the votives were ignited from the original flame. Father John explained that the Pascal candle was a “light in the darkness”, a symbol for hope by our Heavenly Father. 

Guests and Parishioners were invited to place the votives on the altar to represent their own personal prayer intention and everyone chose to participate. Many bereaved parents attended Mass and candles were specifically lit for babies who had died. 

One couple shared that they had learned about the service just the day before from a local infant loss support group.  They had just lost their son two weeks ago and understandably, their grief was still raw. A mother in her 90’s was there to honour three infants whom she had lost more than 60 years ago, “you weren’t to talk about it back then” she explained with tears in her eyes. 

Time for Tea…and Teddy Bears

Families were given the opportunity to meet with one another and share their stories in an informal setting at the reception which was decorated with flowers and teddy bears.  Guests were greeted by friendly volunteers and freshly baked home-made treats. 

To the surprise of many, tea was served in vintage bone china tea cups. This was a family-friendly event and young children happily played together running around with their new teddy bears in hand. 

For some, coming to the service was the first step towards healing, “you could just feel how the heaviness and grief lifted during Mass” a Parishioner told me with a warm smile, she herself a bereaved mother. Indeed, there seemed to be a lot of peace in the hearts of those that I met. Many expressed how thankful they were that the special service was offered.    

With a program, prayer card and a teddy bear tucked under his arm, a bereaved father asked when the next service will be scheduled, “I’m looking forward to it!” he said with a nod before leaving. 

If you are a bereaved family member, please visit littlelightofheaven.com for infant bereavement resources, information about future events and Elizabeth Ministry or email: info(at)littlelightofheaven.com. A Mass at Gardens of Gethsemani Cemetery and a Mother’s Tea in Fort Langley are coming up in March.  

Thank you to those that attended, Father John McCarthy and all the Parish volunteers who assisted in various ways at the Mass and Teddy Bear Tea. We would also like to acknowledge private donors, Gardens of Gethsemani Catholic Cemeteries, and Signal Hill for donating items such as teddy bears and treats for the teddy bear reception.

All your contributions made the event extra special and we couldn’t have done it without your support!     

Feb.18, 2012 – Infant & Child Loss Remembrance Service

*Infant & Child Loss Remembrance Service*

& Teddy Bear Tea

"Light of Life" by Yukon Artist Libby Dulac

St. Nicholas R.C. Church – 20675 87th Ave., Langley, BC

Remembrance Mass Service: 1 pm

“Teddy Bear” Tea Reception: 2 pm hosted by St. Nicholas Parish & local Elizabeth Ministry Chapters

*RSVP: Ann & Donna – info(at)littlelightofheaven.com

Prayers will be included for parents and family members who wish to honour the lives of all children gone-too-soon, including;

– Children of any age

– Infants & Toddlers

– Babies lost shortly after birth and through Sudden Infant Death Syndrome

– Babies who have died during pregnancy for any reason (e.g. ectopic pregnancy, miscarriage, complications and stillbirth)

Couples who are trying to conceive and those struggling with infertility; parents who are expecting and those on a waiting list to adopt; as well as parents who lovingly chose to give up and/or welcome children through adoption and fostering will also be remembered on this day.

TEDDY BEAR TEA

Everyone is welcome to attend the reception immediately after the service.  Families will be offered a teddy bear in honour of their child through Elizabeth Ministry.  These teddy bears have been kindly donated by organizations such as Signal Hill and Gardens of Gethsemani.

Families can enter the name of their child in the “Little Book of Life” and light a candle for their little one.

This event is open to everyone from all faiths and backgrounds, especially bereaved parents and other family members including children, as well as those who support grieving families.

*Please RSVP so that enough programs, candles & refreshments are available.

ADDITIONAL INFORMATION

NOTE: The Teddy Bear Tea is being hosted by St. Nicholas Parish and organized by *Elizabeth Ministry (EM) – St. Nicholas and St. Matthew’s Chapters. Future EM programs and events will be scheduled. Contact Donna or Ann to receive updates.

*Elizabeth Ministry is a faith-based, peer mentorship volunteer organization that celebrates the sanctity of life and honours the lives of all children. If you are interested in donating a teddy bear or refreshments, volunteering or starting a chapter at your Parish, please contact us:

Ann, Elizabeth Minister St. Matthew’s Chapter – annamsing (at) yahoo.com

Donna, Elizabeth Minister St. Nicholas Chapter – info (at) littlelightofheaven.com

~~~

*SHORT DESCRIPTION*

The following is a short summary of the service for email invites and church bulletins etc.

Infant & Child Remembrance Service & Teddy Bear Tea – Sat., Feb.18

St. Nicholas Parish – 20675 87th Ave., Langley, BC.

Mass 1pm, Teddy Bear Tea reception to follow.

Come celebrate the lives of all children who have died at any age, including those lost as an infant or toddler and those who have died during pregnancy or birth for any reason.  Bereaved parents, relatives and friends of all faiths and backgrounds welcome.  At this service, families are invited to light a candle and enter the names of their children in the “Little Book of Life“.  All are welcome!

Teddy bear donations to be given to bereaved families through Elizabeth Ministry (St. Matthew & St. Nicholas Chapters). Please RSVP: info (at)littlelightofheaven.com and visit littlelightofheaven.com for more info.